Conversations with the Man

Me, watching a cute baby cry for mama's boobie at Starbucks with a dazed want-my-own-cute-squishy-thing look: "Awwwww somebody's hungry!"

Man, gestures towards me while grasping his boob, sarcastically: "Milk's coming down, honey?"

Me: "Oh screw off, you know I'm all talk. No babies yet, thank you very much."

Man, thoughtfully gazing: "You know, that's probably why your boobs are so big."

Me: "Huh?"

Man: "Well, after ten years of my whining and crying..."

Me: "Ah, yes. Yes, this is correct."